Meet the 2024 Scholars

"Describe a defining moment in your journey with CF that sparked personal growth or resilience. How did this experience affect you and what did you learn from this moment?"

The first time I remember being hospitalized for CF was in second grade. I was seven. I recall darkness outside, and a teddy bear. At that age, some things just don't make sense, and this was one of those times. I didn't know why this was happening. I never liked the clinic visits or the endless medication or therapy treatments, but this was something new. Flashback to when I was two years old, darkness was outside, and I was in bed. In a few days, I was going to have surgery to insert a feeding tube. My mom told me I asked her, "Am I broken?" I don't remember this firsthand, but that is the best way to describe how I felt in the hospital on that December night five years later-broken. Like any kid in that situation, I was terrified. The idea that I would have a PICC line put in my arm and connected to my heart was scary; it still makes me slightly queasy even though I've done it three times. Seven-year-old me didn't want to miss Christmas or school. I felt like I was being punished for something that I had no control over. I was angry. My first night there I cried while getting an IV. I had with me a Mario stuffed plush, and I remember the nurse hummed the theme from Super Mario Bros. That was the first time I had a real inkling of the fact that I was loved and cared for by these people. The idea didn't fully take root until later, but in that moment I knew the doctors who I saw each clinic visit, who admitted me, and the nurses who poked me with needles, cared about me and my health so much that they forced me to get extra help. My personal growth in my relationship with CF is more a story of my relationship with people. Dealing with a life-threatening disease is really difficult and scary, especially for kids. Occasionally I'll think back to that evening in a hospital room, getting an IV, wondering why I was broken, why this all fell on me. But what stands out isn't the struggle itself, but that nurse who by a simple act changed my perception of people.